Phases

Have you ever sat down and thought about the different phases of your life you've been through? How they've all played a significant role in the shaping and molding of where you are in life at this very moment. I had an epiphany as I was trying to go to sleep last night, I was thinking about where I've been and where I am now, and the Lord gently spoke to me and said "your life, just like the moon you love so much has phases, and though you may not always see in full, I am always shining light on exactly what needs to be seen in that timeframe."

OKAY GOD!

I have always been a huge lover of the moon. Maybe it's because I've always been a night owl, so I've spent many a night staring up at the moon and having deep conversations with her long into the night. But I think it's because it's always made me feel that much closer to the Creator, the one who made my favorite night light up there in the galaxies of wonders. I think back to the time when I was in my deepest darkest pit, I wanted to die. I didn't want to live anymore, I walked around in a continual facade of fake smiles, forced laughter, and red eyes from crying myself to sleep. I remember the night I tried to end my life, the night was dark, and the moon was dark, my thoughts were dark, the night was dark. But it was in that very dark time that the Lord shone the brightest, saving me from making a decision that would have had a ripple effect on all those around me. In all my research done about the moon, the darkest phase of the moon is called “new moon” it refers to the lunar phase that is invisible to us here on Earth because the moon is between the Earth and the sun. This means that its illuminated side is facing away from us and thus, dark to observers. I find it so fascinating that what appears the darkest is called "new". Isn't that just like the Lord, to find us at our darkest, and birth a newness in us. He works from the inside out, so like the new moon, it's being illuminated between earth and the sun, just like our hearts; between our bodies and Heaven where HE is seated on the throne of mercy and grace. We are illuminating from the SON.

NASA puts it this way, "In our entire solar system, the only object that shines with its own light is the Sun. That light always beams onto Earth and Moon from the direction of the Sun, illuminating half of our planet in its orbit and reflecting off the surface of the Moon to create moonlight." We as believers gain our light from the Son of God, reflecting who He is to those around us, beaming of His love for His kids. Are you getting this? Are you putting the pieces together? No matter what "phase" of life we are in, the Son is not far. There may be phases of our lives where it seems dark, and there are most certainly phases where it's bright, not forgetting the half and half as well. That's the beauty of it, no matter what, we are reflecting, we are seen, we are loved. In the Oxford Dictionary, the word Phase is described as "a distinct period or state in a series of events or a process of change or development." Doesn't that sound like our lives? Continually going through different phases or chapters, or stages, or seasons, whatever word you like to use. At the end of the day, nothing is really permanent, except the love of the Lord for us. Because He never changes.

I am so glad that phase of my life is over, but I will never forget it. I was found on the darkest of nights, with the darkest heart, and brought back to the light that has always been with me from the beginning of my existence. I look at my life now, and the phase that I am in. A beautiful, exciting, exhilarating, wild phase of love. I have found my way around the moon again, now feeling like a bright, glowing, bright light that is happily planted in the phase that I was destined to be in. And had I taken my life all those years ago, I would not be where I am today, engaged to the man of my prayers during those long nights with the moon, loving others with the ferocity that the Lord has for me, pushing away the darkness from those around me, offering them a place of illumination in their darkness for the SON to do His work. Whatever the phase you may be in today, always remember that the Lord is close to you, He is shining His glorious light upon you so that you illuminate Him to all those around you. So shine on loves, shine on, no matter the phase.